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— P.D. Ouspensky

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Posts Tagged ‘women’

An Apprenticeship in Stretching the Heart

Thursday, June 24, 2010

The last few days have flown by as we have completed our Academy for Conscious Change intensive training course.  Today our teams made final presentations.  The work they are embarking upon is not easy, and they challenge me to think about how I might go about advancing my own rights in the face of opposition or threat of violence.

One team, “Handicap Rwanda, Reintegration, Rehabilitation & Development “ (HRD) is working on violence against women who have handicapped children.  Apparently, the stigma is so great against children with disabilities (including the blind, deaf, mentally disabled and physically handicapped) that they are often kept home from school, as they are considered to be without value to society.  HRD is providing education to parents about how to care for their children, and they will be creating an association for the mothers so that they can earn income to contribute to the needs of their family.  Through this association, they will have access to a support group with whom to share their challenges so that they will not feel isolated from the rest of society that discriminates against them.  The venture will also travel to raise awareness about the rights of children and the needs of  handicapped children.

Another team, titled “A Friend Indeed”, is combating the issue of violence against single mothers.  They are working with 80 single mothers, with a total 120 children, in learning how to parent.  They visit the mothers every two weeks to provide support in child care.  They are also providing education to young girls about reproductive health.  Finally, they will utilize theater to fight the stigma against single mothers and young women who seek access to contraception.  Their vision is that no child will be born who is not planned or wanted, and they hope to expand their program nation-wide.

In the next phase of the Academy, the teams develop a comprehensive venture plan over the next 3-6 months with our advisory support.  I cannot help feeling like a committed coach rooting for their success.  And yet, who am I to coach them?  Each of them is living in the midst of hardship unimaginable to most Americans, and yet they are fearlessly committed to working with those even more vulnerable than they to advance equality, opportunity, justice, and human rights.

Take “Justine” for example.  She has four children, including a teenage daughter born of another man.  Her current husband is HIV+ and sounds as if he is battling severe depression as a result of his circumstances.  Luckily, neither Justine nor her children are HIV+.  However, she carries the full weight of her husband’s anxieties, as he contends the support she provides for his step-daughter to go to school results in less care and attention for his own needs.  He frequently demands the daughter be sent away to live with her grandparents.  Justine is caught between a dying husband and an isolated daughter, both of whom need her care.  Even still, Justine is working to fight unplanned pregnancies through reproductive health education within her community.  Apparently there have already been three pregnancies of young girls aged 12 -14 in their village this year.

These women’s hearts stretch to what appears to be a limitless capacity to take on the needs of others.  I think I could stand to do an apprenticeship with each one of them.

Day 5: Women’s Outer Wisdom

Friday, June 18, 2010

I do believe that in many cases, wisdom and intuition may be all we need to guide us.  And time and time again, the Rwandan women we partner with demonstrate just that.

Today we conducted another exercise to diagnose the priority issues facing women in their communities.  The women shared about the myriad of underlying challenges to educating girls:  One root cause was that girls frequently drop out of school when they start menstruating.  Without affordable access to sanitary products or bathing facilities, girls often stain themselves.  Ridiculed by boys, girls simply stop coming to school during menstruation.  Others face spying or even assault in shared latrines.  Further is the difficulty faced by the children of prostitutes.  When their mothers see clients in their tiny houses, the children can’t study and have to leave.  Teachers in their community have coming together privately to provide these children with safe spaces to study for their exams. Additionally, young girls are often targeted by older men, who find them easy to manipulate with small gifts and nice clothes.  A myth that sleeping with a virgin will cure HIV further exacerbates the issue.  And most of these predators believe that if the girls are young enough there is no risk of pregnancy.  Yet in one small village, three 12-14 year-olds had recently fallen pregnant.  When girls get pregnant, they are sometimes rejected by their families and end up dropping out of school for good.  While contraception is free with health insurance, young girls are too afraid to try to access it in public clinics in small villages where it would be generally unacceptable to be sexually active at that age and out of marriage.

With a very sophisticated and in-depth knowledge of the complexities of these social issues, the Rwandan women change agents we support are embarking upon the courageous process of initiating their own solutions.  Why any international NGO would think they have more knowledge about what priority issues face these communities and what is needed, I don’t know.  As many challenges as may exist in these rural communities, there are as many remarkable women leaders willing to dedicate themselves to their eradication.  I fully trust these women’s wisdom, and I invite all to watch over the next year as they set about solving these issues themselves from the grassroots level up.  It is truly an honor to partner with them in this work.

Day 4 Women’s Inner Wisdom

Friday, June 18, 2010

The last two days of our Academy for Conscious Change have been full of tiny miracles and awe-inspiring moments. Thursday we began a journey with our women that started with yoga, continued with a short session of deep breathing and then a short meditation.  Out of the meditation, our participants responded to a simple invitation:  What is one thing you know to be true?  I was deeply moved by their wisdom. Here are a few of their responses:

  • There is no difference between love and compassion
  • Everyone thinks that animals are ignorant, but when you take care of them every day, you realize that they can recognize you outside and know when you are inside your house
  • Love is more powerful than war.  Forgiveness is more powerful than punishment
  • You can be rich without security and peace of mind, but the poor can be free without stress
  • Life is short. Don’t pay attention to the problems you can’t control
  • Bananas take five months to grow from the flower
  • You can’t succeed when you feel afraid
  • Families of alcoholics can’t progress
  • Reflecting before reacting is better and can help you to have a better relationship
  • There are no wild animals that will eat you if you go outside at night
  • Women taking care of children alone are overworked
  • Even if you are rich and can buy nice clothes, that doesn’t mean you look good

I’m working on a few of my own truths:

  • Each moment is always new
  • Breathing can heal
  • Anyone who enters your life (whether they love you or challenge you) is there to teach you something
  • Real outer change is inner-directed
  • Animals generally don’t want to be eaten
  • The things that really need to be done don’t need to be on a list
  • Food tastes better when you grow it yourself
  • I feel more grounded when I’m barefoot
  • At our very smallest components, all things are the same
  • The only thing that exists is now

In Search of Obama in Rwanda

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Each day we drive in a rented minibus to the rural village of Byimana about 1.5 hours outside of Kigali.  The scenery is stunning.  The road meanders around tall, terraced hills.  Women and children walk along mountain paths with yellow jerry cans on their heads.   Toddlers who catch our eye wave from the roadside.  The hills are an alternating fabric of banana trees and slanted, emerald farmland.

Today we passed by a local market on market day.  Usually we see the empty skeleton of the market and can only imagine what fills the area below the crooked grass roofs marking each stall. But today, the grass field was awash with women perched between mounds of tomatoes, bananas, oranges, potatoes, avocados, mangoes.  Serpentine walls of colored fabric separated the produce from the clothing sections. Higher on the hill, men and women attended grass mats filled with household goods.

But I was in search of Obama.

Now I must take a step back and try to describe the extraordinary fabric that Rwandan women typically wear wrapped around their waist. VERITABLE REAL WAX is stamped along the edges.  Prints of flowers, images and swirls of color – orange, blue, yellow, burgundy, green – make each one a work of art.  I’ve also seen prints with images as odd as New York City skylines.  A friend is coveting fabric made with the faces of African leaders – Mandela, Kagame, Mugabe.  She’s making a quilt.  But nothing is as amazing to me as the Obama fabric – round images of Obama’s likeness plastered across an African print background.   I am determined to find some.

Every stall we went to, Gyslaine asked if they had Obama.  Some had seen some on Tuesday, others said I could find him in the center of Kigali.  A few had him last week, but he was already gone.   So my search for Obama will continue this weekend.  I know he’s here in Rwanda.  It’s only a matter of time before I find him.

Breathing in Byimana

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

I should pause and describe the scene of our Academy program in the village of Byimana.  I sometimes forget to do so, as much of what I experience, which would be so exotic for another, is something that I have come to find so comfortingly familiar here in Rwanda:  The women in their beautiful multicolored wrapped skirts; a sweet child sitting on the floor of our classroom while his mother takes notes; ten children and men peering through the bars in the windows of our classroom wondering what we are doing; giggles from small children as they ask to have our empty water bottles.  We are teaching in a small building used by Byimana local government.  It is a single room with plastered walls and a cement floor.  Narrow benches form our seating, and though the women are more comfortable setting up the room for me as if I am preaching to their congregation, we rearrange the benches in a circle so we can all address each other.  They watch me with curiosity, but they are open-minded and willing to participate in whatever I initiate for our class.

I’m feeling more grounded.  I’m grateful for all the visitors with me – they’re challenging me and bringing really valuable ideas to the table. And the tension that marked our first gathering – a combination of nerves, anticipation, uncertainty about how my offering would be experienced – has left me now.

On our second day, we went in depth into the personal transformation portion of our work.  We started out by exploring our own desires and aversion to change and the emotional reactivity that sometimes causes us to create harm inadvertently.  We considered how perspective and preference can cause angst and how trusting the intuitive sense can help us access inner wisdom.  And then we breathed.

I’m utilizing a technique called Coherent Breathing and a program called Breath~Body~Mind which was developed by Dr. Richard P. Brown and Dr. Patricia Gerbarg to relieve stress and trauma. This program includes Coherent Breathing (influenced by Stephen Elliot) and Qigong movements from Master Robert Peng.  Coherent Breathing sets the optimal pace of breathing necessary to enable your body to rebalance the autonomic nervous system resulting in greater calmness, energy, and resilience.  Our women have taken an assessment to measure their level of post-traumatic stress, but through simple observation, I can see the stress melt from their shoulders, feel the energy shift in the room, and hear their comments afterwards that they feel deeply rested.  One rather heavy-set, beautiful, enthusiastic woman even exclaimed that she felt so light she must have lost several pounds!  The woman have already asked how they can teach the technique to others, including children in their communities. I am encouraged.

Tomorrow we explore power.

A small miracle

Monday, June 14, 2010

Today was my first day of training for our 2010 Academy for Conscious Change.  I was actually really nervous for the first time in a while.  But it was not because of my new group of participants, but more because I had a large group of Americans observing, which is not usually the case.  I will be curious about what they think as we get deeper into the course.

We have an amazing group of Rwandan participants – 34 women and 3 men representing 8 different teams working on a range of issues from domestic violence to malnutrition.  All seem deeply committed to their social issue and open minded enough to let a crazy “muzungu” get them to do a bit of Qigong and then lie down on the floor for a round of coherent breathwork.  They giggled and kept one eye open (and on me) even during the meditations, but they were willing to participate and I am ever so grateful for it.

We ended the day with homework that encouraged each individual to notice the little miracles happening around them.  As we clarified what that meant, one woman offered her example of what she thought that might mean from what she had experienced that day.  She told us that she originally thought foreigners were stiff, inflexible and formal.  But when she saw us lying on the floor too and when Laya, one of our staff from San Francisco gave her a kiss on the cheek to greet her, she felt that moment to be a miracle.  As my Program Officer Gyslaine translated for us, I got chills.  The woman explained, it was a miracle not just because we were friendly, but we were willing to touch them and get close to them and get down on the ground with them and just be with them.

Back to Rwanda

Saturday, June 12, 2010

I am writing over a triple Kenyan latte in Nairobi’s airport.  The sun is coming up.  World Cup fans fill the spaces usually taken up by foreign aid workers and African businessmen.   All are wearing evidence of their leanings – a jersey, a scarf, a hat, a patch.  They are not afraid.  Everyone is glued to CNN.  South Africa looks like they are celebrating New Years.  The flight attendants on Kenya Airways even have new uniforms – red jerseys that say GO AFRICA on the back with a big soccer ball on the front.  In Amsterdam, bright orange was worn everywhere by loyal fans.  Even the public restrooms in the airport had bright orange toilet paper. It feels as if the rest of the world is having a party that the Americans are too busy to attend.  How is it we can’t quite get into the fabulous sport of soccer/futbol?

I think the two days it takes me to get to Africa are good for me.  They allows for a slow transition whereby I leave behind the hurried pace of America, where I work most days as a one-woman show wearing a hundred hats.  Over dark coffee in several airports, I slowly ease into a place of presence, ready to arrive as GG “President” to the hundreds of women and staff I have taught and learned from since 2005. In less than 2 days I’ll be hosting a new Academy for Conscious Change.  I can’t wait.

A Breath of Fresh Hope for Women in Haiti’s Tent Camps

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Port-au-Prince Haiti, March 13, 2010

AMURTEL Haiti (www.amurtelhaiti.org), is the women-managed wing of AMURT, which has been working in the country since 1998 as a registered NGO.  Their mission  is to improve the quality of life for disadvantaged women and children, and provide  relief  in natural and man-made disasters. AMURTEL particularly focuses on creating empowering and long term sustainable strategies for holistic community development. In response to the devastating earthquake that hit Port au Prince January 12, 2010, AMURTEL has partnered with several other agencies to offer life-saving services and resources to 14 refugee camps in the surrounding neighborhoods of Jobel and Lavale Bourdon, Port Au Prince, serving 10,444 displaced people. Global Grassroots partnered with AMURTEL to offer a trauma healing workshop in Coherent Breathing to women displaced by the earthquake. The following was written by Didi Ananda Deva Priya, one of the female monks working with AMURTEL in Haiti.

With quick efficiency, the camp committee in the Sitron camp announced our arrival for a women’s gathering. Soon the women were spreading  large grey tarps on the bare ground, and to our surprise, a microphone and amplifier were waiting in the middle of the space. I was amazed to see that already the camp had wired electric lines throughout the site, and indeed, a bulb was shining in a hut on the hill. Two months have now passed since the earthquake, and people have begun to settle and adapt to the circumstances with characteristic resilience. The construction of latrines was nearing completion, and groups of men were busy chopping poles to construct a large community tent for clinics, meetings, religious services and other collective events.

As the women began gathering, it seemed at first, that there would be plenty of space to do the deep relaxation exercises and yoga that the AMURTEL team had planned together with our partners from Global Grassroots. It would be a new experience for both Gretchen, from Global Grassroots, who has worked facilitating women’s trauma recovery for survivors of the Rwandan genocide, as well as for  the Didis from AMURTEL who have years of experience as meditation and yoga instructors. Soon the space on the tarps were completely packed with at least 150 women and girls of all ages, and even the men in the camp had gathered around in interest. Plans were quickly improvised to adapt to the tight space.

Gretchen opened the gathering by explaining the normal reactions to a stressful event such as the earthquake. As she described common experiences, such as trembling, difficulties with sleep, racing heartbeat, over-sensitivity to certain sounds, hyper-alertness, and more, the women began nodding empathically and eagerly joined in discussion, sharing their own experiences vividly. They all expressed great relief at discovering that they were not sick, but rather having a normal reaction to an abnormal event. They listened with keen interest as Gretchen described how the stress regulating system in our bodies, intended to help us survive trauma, can remain stuck “on”, in ways that become unhealthy. Then she led the group in a series of breathing exercises, followed by the Didis who led some loosening warmups, yoga exercises (in the end, just one standing up posture suitable to the cramped conditions). The yoga sequence ended with a self massage, which they enjoyed immensely, and by then the initially giggly and noisy group had settled down into a calm and open feeling. This was followed by a session of relaxation, with slow, regular, timed breathing designed to awaken a relaxation response and turn the stress system “off”. The women were elated to share how they felt lighter, rested, and hopeful that they would be able to return to normal again with techniques which were simple and easy to remember for practicing on their own.  The session ended with singing on a joyful, uplifting note. An elderly man approached one of our native Haitian volunteers, and expressed how grateful he was that we were sharing this for free – he understood how important it was for their healing, and that they would not have normally been able to afford access to such techniques. The singing continued echoing from the hills  even as we walked out of the camp.

A Breathwork Practitioner in Haiti

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Barbara Johnson is a senior Breathwork Practitioner with the Inspiration Community (www.inspirationcommunity.org) in Baltimore, MD.  She traveled to Haiti as a volunteer with Global Grassroots for two weeks in March to offer trauma healing using breathwork to help women traumatized by the earthquake.  Following is a letter from Barbara to her family and friends.

Dear All,

I returned from Haiti early yesterday morning. I was and am so grateful for your support (financial, spiritual, emotional, all of it!) which was a touchstone during my amazing time there.

We arrived March 1 and drove to the site of the ruined Hotel Montana, which was, before January 12, the finest hotel in Haiti; a lovely site on a hilltop overlooking the city of Port-au-Prince and the sea. The site, now referred to by the search and recovery teams as “The Pile”, was my home for 12 days. Our camp had been established by Gretchen and Andrew Wallace and Gretchen’s brother Brian Steidle when they arrived a few days after the quake, to aid with the huge multinational recovery of the hundreds of victims at that site.

Gretchen and I went to teach a simple practice we learned last month from Dr. Richard Brown of Columbia University and Dr. Patricia Gerbarg of New York Medical College (www.haveahealthymind.com).   This technique has been shown to prevent chronic PTSD and has been used with victims of natural disasters, with first responders, and with war veterans.

When people suffer a traumatic event, the sympathetic branch of the autonomic nervous system engages. This “fight, flight or freeze” response, so essential to us when we need to escape or otherwise summon strength and alertness, often stays engaged, overwhelming the normal swing back to the parasympathetic branch (the “rest, digest, and recover” response). Symptoms people experience when stuck in the stress response include sleeplessness, nightmares, constant worry and vigilance, overactive startle reflex, digestive problems, high blood pressure, depression and numbness, anger and irritability, muscle tension manifesting as head, jaw or back pain, and shallow breathing. People who are caring for traumatized people often suffer their own trauma, experiencing the same symptoms.

The practice we learned has three parts; movement, Coherent Breathing, and group bonding. The movement piece is useful because trauma victims are often mentally dissociated from their bodies. The breath component, 10 minutes of lying down and breathing 5 breaths/minute through the nose, uses the optimal rate for engaging the parasympathetic branch of the autonomic nervous system. The bonding piece at the end, which includes group sharing and singing, helps integrate the process into normal life activities and community.

With the help of a generous and gracious translator [working as the operations director for partner organization AMURTEL, http://amurtel.org] named Jayatii, we taught this technique to refugees, to aid workers, to Haitian community liaisons, to NGO employees, and to school children. Our smallest group was 6 people and our largest about 150.

When we described the stress response as a normal reaction to trauma, we heard, over and over, statements like: “I thought I was crazy”, “I thought I was the only one”, “I have been angry with myself that I can’t just get over this”, “I thought I was getting a bad disease”, and “I’m exhausted taking care of my grieving friend”.

After the breathing, many people shared the experience of feeling relief. We heard repeated versions of: “I feel like I have been born into a new life”, “I feel like a heavy weight has been removed”, “My headache is gone”, “My back isn’t hurting now”, “I haven’t felt this relaxed since the earthquake” “I feel happy that I have a way to help myself feel better” and “I’m going to show this to my grandmother”.

We told them they could use the breathing practice when they were going to sleep and when they were distressed, and that the relaxed breathing would become more easy and natural with daily practice. We encouraged them to share this simple method with their loved ones, and many told us they had been or planned to.

I was inspired and moved beyond the telling by these resilient, courageous, beleaguered people. I had expected to find a war zone peopled with zombies. The war zone was right, but zombies they are most emphatically not. They are vibrantly busy with the work of rebuilding their lives, businesses and communities despite nationwide grief, seemingly insurmountable devastation, terrible lack of food, water, medical care and housing, desperate poverty, and the prospect of being moved away from their communities into the unknown.

I wish to thank Drs. Brown and Gerbarg for their research, their work, and their teaching expertise, and for their generosity.  They donated a weekend to training us in their home and fielding many questions.

I want to thank and acknowledge Gretchen Wallace of Global Grassroots for inviting me along and for  exposing me to her great courage, grace, persistence, sensitivity and skill in teaming with individuals and  organizations, and in working with people from other cultures.  Global Grassroots is investigating some exciting opportunities to continue serving communities in Haiti. I will pass these on as they are formalized. And I will be posting photos and videos of our work.

Thanks again for your interest!

Gratefully,
Barbara

What Would She Do?

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

I was recently asked by a friend to participate in an exciting experiment.  The instructions?

You are responsible for creating an organization in which people offer their greatest gifts. Describe it.

The purpose?

The instigators of this experiment propose: “Women will revolutionize how we think about work and have clear ideas for change.  Women have the most to gain from a new organizational model, so it is up to us to take responsibility for creating it… An organization intent on leveraging people’s “greatest gifts” will, in fact, be more effective, efficient, profitable and fulfilling to all stakeholders.”  Over the course of 365 days, they will be posting the viewpoints of 365 women and then working to explore and distill the patterns that arise.

Check this out as it unfolds: http://www.whatwouldshedo.blogspot.com/

And here is my contribution:

My dream organization has its center in a simple office in a natural setting, where the wall-length doors slide open during warm weather and where large windows allow a constant connection with the earth and sky. A shared kitchen with an eclectic mix of chairs, pottery and produce, harvested from a common garden supports individual wellness. Members of this circle connect virtually or in person to collaborate, create, innovate and engage around work that is aligned by a common purpose and has a broad social impact on a global level.

The organization measures its success in terms of its capacity to create systemic transformation leading to a more conscious society. It is inner-driven and outer-focused: individuals engage in their own work towards deeper self-knowledge, while striving collectively to advance positive change for the common good. The organization’s structure, operations, services and outputs are all designed to maximize social value creation, while ensuring environmental and economic sustainability. There is a code to do no harm. The circle does not seek simple consensus, but invites a diversity of perspective and debate for innovation. It engages stakeholders and beneficiaries in ongoing dialogue and evaluation. As a tribe, it recognizes it is a member of a universal, living ecosystem, and thus is open to its own evolution and even its own dissolution if that is the highest need.

Individuals invited and drawn to this collective are given time to explore, identify, nurture and apply their greatest gifts, passions, and talents. Then they commit to making their unique contribution towards the organization’s vision. Though there is a leadership structure that guides the tribe, there is participation at all levels in setting strategy, goals and objectives. Teams are formed primarily on a project basis for a specific scope of work, while ongoing operational and administrative needs are handled through shared responsibility with a spirit of service.

The organization insists on an equitable investment in both inner growth and outer work. It encourages daily practice for personal growth, and provides for structure and coaching along a path for professional development. When its members need solitude for renewal, reflection or creative processes, they can easily access the adjacent healing/yoga/ meditation rooms, organic garden, library, walking trails, and a musical/artistic white space – or not come in at all.

Core operational values include: integrity, open communication, human understanding, shared knowledge, active learning, and experimentation. Time schedules honor an individual’s circadian and creative rhythms, and so the space may have occupants at odd hours of the day and sometimes no one at all. People are compensated based on their social value creation, which may change with each project depending upon roles. Performance is assessed by the whole community, and trust allows colleagues to challenge and support each other in pushing beyond their individual growth edges. Collectively, the tribe is both a microcosm of and an advocate for a whole, just and compassionate society.


Global Grassroots  |  45 Lyme Road, Suite 206  |  Hanover, NH 03755 USA  |  Tel (+1) 603.643.0400  |  Fax: (+1) 603.619.0076  |  info@globalgrassroots.org
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